to my dearest boy.

I love my weekends with you.
Just hugging you makes me feel really intoxicated.
Please don't get upset coz or stress coz i asked for time off with my family on weekends.
I know how much you wanna see me during the weekends... I too wanna do that... but... i only have that limited time and i wan to make sure that... both my family and u are happy ...coz to me... your are all very important in my life. Your make my life complete..... I hope you understand..

Tonight i hope you had fun with the guys.!  Though im home doing some work.. but don't worry, as promised i din emo... lolx.. or at least i tried not too... =)


*Im bored! I need to find something fun to entertain myself*

A friend of mine told me this......**** is like an investment

You can work so hard and put your money in, but there is no guarantee of a return....its so saddening sometimes... too much risk involved..

and she really knows me damn farking well.! hahahahhaaa yes babe. no b tonite....

Im determine to take dat habit off. =)

today i was flipping  FB and i saw this.... which i totally agree...


"No guy is worth your tears & ; the one who is... won’t make you cry."

im telling that to myself and my friends around me.....Find a guy who is worthy of your love and who loves you and never makes u cry...... =)


im glad i've found u.

I'm pressed but not crushed persecuted not abandoned
Struck down but not destroyed
I'm blessed beyond the curse for his promise will endure
And his joy's gonna be my strength

Though the sorrow may last for the night
His joy comes with the morning...

I am a princess and you are my strength!

Today, i am so glad that i went to church... this week.. coz maybe i was home for quite a few days.. i tend to get a little emo and upset about many things as i den have time to sit back and think through my life up till date. Getting to know what has really happened over the months where i was so busy with work... was great..... i kinda realised that we are all human in flesh and without Christ we are all nothing but a pile of ash.... and we ought to be thankful to daddy God who guides us and leads us.. never fails to brighten and lighten up my day.... he is my refuge and my most loyal friend...... he understands me the best, even to the extend of knowing how many strands of hair i have on my head..... so lord... thank u for renewing my heart. though i was a little emo.. but going to church and listening to your word...really is my source of rejuvenation.

 I love it when Pastor mentioned about God being the last and most important man in our life..... he is the only one who can heal that broken hearted....and... give us peace and rest.... i really believe so.....

Many times... though i really try hard not to think back on my past... but somehow these flashbacks still keep haunting me. Each and every time that happens... i start to feel very empty and lost...  sad... but im trusting the lord to take all of that away and heal my broken heart.... though.... my dearest boy has really been quite a gd bf up till date.... always giving me attention n all... i really love him deeply... but somehow... i just need time to heal that wound of mine.. its no longer bleeding... but sometimes... infection just attacks me and im using God as my detol and antiseptic cream to heal that wound.... i trust that the day where im totally set free from all condemnation and heart ache... will come soon and i can den rejoice and  be glad for that healing! amen.


P.s.  I really wan to tell u..... thank you for loving me... im glad that I've chosen u coz.. up till date... i think i've made the right choice... though sometimes i can be very irritating and get emo and stuff.. but please don't give up on me because other than daddy God being my pillar of strength.... now... you have also become one of my pillar of strength.. i love u and im thankful that the Lord has brought u to me....

i love u

Saying i love u is simple... but really meaning it from deep down from your heart... isn't that simple.
--------> from the bottom of my heart... i love u. =)


It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy relationships...


---->i love u and want  u to be my best friend forever.

Happy birthday to my grandfather!

Im so glad that today's party though was not perfect but was at least v good for the elderly as they at least like wad my mum said... could kinda resolve their years of misunderstanding that they had for each other ... no matter wad.. still brothers and sisters mah right?

Most importantly...I am so glad that mummy could at least share lots of her intimate moments and ideas with me and was really open in her teachings towards me..... Sometimes... though i think my mum can be really noisy... but i am still glad that she is my mum...... in many ways i am what i am because of her patience and years of nurturing......

My daddy has just gotta start learning to treasure this women. When my mum started sharing with me moments of what my dad did to her again.... today that made her furious with him.... I totally can understand how she feels.... and yah... man with testicles cannot be trusted.... Why does he always gotta get involved in this woman? So excited to see her that even this family dinner also can skip?

He choose to meet her instead of eating dinner w us... haix...

I am so disappointed with him ..... really..

I really wonder sometimes.... is it a right thing to fall in love... a right thing to then marry a man... Coz.. who knows..... one day if he starts cheating on you.... your dreams of living happily ever after will all be shattered.....

A phase my good friend quoted.. " the first cause of divorce is marriage" Is that really true? i wonder sometimes...

All the cartoons that i've been watching since young, has really made me think that happily ever after is possible... but how often is that a smooth sailing route?.... U see... many times... these princess-ey stories always ends when the couple gets married.... but often.. problems only start after marriage... coz if boy and girl friends cannot even resolve their difference in the start.. they wont even walk to the stage of marriage right... so yah... may be the start of hell is when one gets married... and puts on that ring.... 

Ok i know.. i am getting a little pessimistic here..... but i guess ..... i am really starting to think this way coz... my mum told me.. that my uncle who recently got divorced.. already got another girlfriend...... who is also a divorcee..... im really thinking what is this world coming too? Is there really happily every after...? Can a couple.. at 80 years old still be happily walking down the street... still holding each other's hands tight and never letting go?.... its really a rare sight to see such a thing happening... but... that has always been my dream......

i really hope that dreams do come true....... =)

Sometimes....

Sometimes...i just feel so drained. just like today... guess my holidays for 1 month will be a good time for me to recuperate.....

Sometimes...although its hard to spell everything out clearly, but i hope that deep down u'll be able to understand my feelings.

Sometimes u've just gotta understand that women are just more sensative than men!

Sometimes life just don't go as planned... but God will lead the way...

Sometimes i just want time alone to cool down coz i am not in a good mood and i don't feel like opening my mouth to talk....

Sometimes i just love to walk my dog larry and complain all my frustrations n unhappiness to him....

Sometimes... i just feel like drinking beer to forget all those unhappy things in my life...

Sometimes... crying is the best way for me to release my unhappiness.

Sometimes....i  just feel so empty and sad inside .....


Sometimes.....i just need u by my side.

What F***ing rights do my idiotic brother have in touching my laptop.! I told u millions and trillions of times not to touch my thing! Why din u listen. U could have just asked and i would let u use it but u just disrespected me! ASSHOLE! And a simple apology was so difficult? I told u.. i count to 10 and if u don't apologise... i'll no longer treat u as my brother and i mean it. I really hate u and wish that I din pray for ur existence!  u deserve it.... spoiled thumb drive... hahahaha. u deserve it.! I won't be nice to you anymore, i won't teach any English, I won't give u anymore $ anymore noodles... I'll treat u as non-existence..... i hate u.

Sometimes i feel so tired in being myself... Why do i have to be the one to bother if my brother has school uniform to wear to school when my mum is not around. He should manage it himself.! He is already 15 years old...! not young anymore.! and im always getting blame for not washing the clothes... just because im a girl? UNFAIR!

This weekend was really short somehow coz my dearest fish and i were busy chionging my favourite korean drama personal preference.! Dear, though we seem to be doing very simple things but all these simple things make up our life isn't it? I really appreciate the fact that a person like u... who don't chiong drama would for my sake start to even watch korean dramas.... lolx...  i love u. =) Btw, if u know me, i am a person who love doing simple things and doing and sharing these simple moments with u.. really makes me love u more and more lo.. =X


Oh yah... and we finally get to fly kite! OMG and I should share this really hilarious joke with you. Fish and I were lyk flying kite, he was lyk controling the kite coz i know nuts about getting the kite flying...so my job was to let go the string from the roller. den... he say fang fang fang and guess wad... both of us let go of the last bit of string the kite had and phew.... our kite flew from one end of the park to the other end, even flying across a pond.. imagine how far it flew. hahahhaahah it was so funny seeing my dear boy running after the kite and even resorting to taking off his slipper to chase after the kite...thank u.

this is just another episode of us.... i hope there will be endless of happy and funny episodes that i can keep updating.... =)

My weekends

This weekend started out great but ended with a bad note.... coz... my sunday dinner turned out bad.

Han Tiong was really funny... saying... Please take a name card... to remind yourself not to come back anymore. Lolx. the service was like shit, unorganised, too little service crew serving and the food was terrible. I asked for medium and got medium rare, my uncle asked for medium rare and got well done steak instead.! wth! Anyway, the mushroom souphad sand in it and the clam spagetti was overly fishy... not fresh... and they took really long to serve our main course.. ok so... we ordered around 7.15pm and got our main dish around 8.30pm? like.... are u still catching the cow? wah laox.... anyway, i'll never go back to Aca*ia restaurant in the park ever! food not cheap and terrible. My mum kept farting after eating the food. My fishy had to leave 9pm and imagine i had to keep asking them to serve our food... grrr

Ok other than that terrible meal which i totally told dad....i'll pay for it... take it as his father's day treat.. lolx...  my sunday was still fine. At least my dear went to church with me. though we nearly slept the whole way through the sermon coz we were dead tired but at least we made effort to be at church... we tried...

Sat... we watched twilight.. and i really think that bella should be with the wolf.... lolx 

Friday.. Serene was at my place we watch san ge hao ren and then... i went for tuition. At night my dear and i ate xiao long bao at jurong point. hee-

hmmm... this is weird isn't it.. i started recollecting my weekend form the the latest thing that happened. lolx. strange..... my brain structure is... a little different and that makes me special right? ..... ok even if u don't think so... i bet my dog larry thinks otherwise.

lolx.. this was my weekend. Tmr school is starting and i am so sian....

siansation.....

My  long weekend was fun!  I had lotsa fun prawning with dear and fishing with my babe serene. Her father really gives me the fatherly feeling when he keeps asking me to put on a shirt and long pants to cover up.... also the sun glass and hat. (Scared i kanar sun burn) He is really concerned and that makes me feel at home... really. I love sleeping in her bed. I slept so well... maybe coz her bed is really comfy and it feels like mine. hehehe..

Fishing is fun! i'll be bringing mum fishing for her birthday present! hehee and in exchange she prepares the rod. hahahahha smart right..

Oh yah, today.... QH started work at my place and I had a busy time training her, replying some company's naggy, multiple emails, also doing my usual cold calls, helping boss do up lotsa stuff before I xia ban! Had to still go tuition loh.

 My dear, you dont hafta worry about me... I'll keep myself busy one. =)